Sunday, August 13, 2006

Guns N' Roses - Aerosmith: Mama Kin

Guns N' Roses playing "mama kin" live in paris in 1992

Wednesday, August 09, 2006


Or does it seem like the average, everyday, bum getting more aggressive? I used to be one of those people who let things go. I often gave a person who was seeking a handout the benefit of the doubt. I figured maybe they weren’t ALL winos and crack-heads, some could possibly be out of work Enron executives (somewhat lower than a crack-head) or maybe a poor bastard who had his wife leave him and take everything he owns, but whatever the story…I try to be compassionate in a standoffish sort of way. Hell…I’ve even been known to let go of a dollar or two when I had it to spare.

So, that is why I get particularly PISSED OFF when a bum gives me shit. That’s right wash my mouth out with soap, but that’s just what this bum did to me today…because I wouldn’t give him a dollar.

My lawnmower ran out of gas while I was mowing the lawn this morning. So I grabbed up my little 1 ½ gal gas can and trudged up to the service station. I went in and told the attendant that I needed $2.00 worth of regular and proceeded out the door to PUMP#1.

As I was headed out the door some guy said “Hey man! I ain’t seen you in a long time! How you doing?” I didn’t have a clue as to whether I had ever met this person or not, but it’s not unusual for people to know me, and me NOT know them. I’ve lived and worked in the neighborhood most of my life, people come and go, but I’m usually a constant.

I acknowledged his greeting with the customary head nod and “I’m fine.” I usually keep my responses brief with questionable people, IE: Those that SAY they know me, but I don’t recollect ever meeting. There is usually some request to follow, so, why engage them in conversation? I already have an idea where it’s going to end.

Sure enough…as I’m pumping my measly $2.00 worth of gas into my can he makes his first pitch.

“Hey man, I hate to bother you and all, but can I borrow a $1.00 from ya?”

I replied… “Sorry man, I spent my LAST $2.00 on gas for my lawnmower.”

Now this should have ended it with most people, but not this persistent bastard… “Aw come on” he said, “I know you gotta dollar, just a dollar man?” “I need some gas to.”

It continued much the same way while I was trying to fill up my little can, paying close attention so as not to spill one drop of the precious, overpriced, liquid.

Finally as I was putting the cap on the can, he began to walk away, but not before muttering… “Damn white people…won’t even give a brother a dollar.” Then he turned around and hollered… “You MUTHAF**KERS is the REASON GAS IS SO HIGH!!”

I just looked at him and thought… Is that anyway to get someone to give you something? I mean lets face it… I knew if I was to give him a dollar I would never get it back, and I wouldn’t EXPECT it back. But, don’t PISS ON MY HEAD AND TELL ME IT’S RAINING either! Don’t get mad at me when your DUMBASS, PANHANDLING, PLOY DON’T WORK!

I wonder if he would have commented on my lack of pigmentation if I had given him a dollar? More than likely this ASS-HOLE would have asked if that was all I had?

I wonder if ALL US MUTHAF**KERS would have been to blame if I had given him a dollar? Or would just some of us muthaf**kers have been to blame?

I guess it’s a bold new world when the bums are trying to impose white guilt on someone who is just barely getting by himself, but isn’t hanging out at the gas station yet.

What really PISSES ME OFF, is that if I had money to spare…I may have given it to him. But, what if I had…and then he decides to pull the same shit on someone else who was not in a position to give him something…like he did to me?

It ALMOST makes want to give up on humanity.

I remember coming up as a kid and hanging around the neighborhood winos. They were a different breed back then. Most of em were affable even when they were sloppy drunk. Kinda like Curtis Lowe, they were neighborhood characters whose drunken exploits entertained the neighborhood. Hell, you might even be led to bring one over for Thanksgiving or at least bring him a plate.

Whatever happened to those guys? Is there some kind of derelicts union or something now? Some kind of collective bargaining for street bums? I don’t remember the winos of old feeling like they were entitled to anything. They were bums, they knew it, and they blamed themselves. They usually ended their pitch with… “please.”

That’s why I am calling a temporary hold on ALL my contributions to BUMS… until they bring back some CIVILITY to begging.

If you are a BUM, and you have CHOSEN to be one… don’t be afraid to ask for a handout, but be humble enough to recognize that YOU ARE NOT ENTITLED TO ONE!

Oh… and entertain me or something…damn-it !